Tuesday, May 30, 2017

A rant, a long winded, rant

I hate being the caretaker to someone who is dying and refuses to accept that she is dying. I hate that I have to give up my future, I can't finish school, I can't work a normal job...all so I can play caregiver to a miserable, emotionally manipulative bitch.

I hate the constant Dr's appointments, I hate filling the pills, I hate going to the pharmacy, I hate PT/OT/Home Health assholes walking in here every fucking day and telling me how things should be. Fuck them. seriously, they have no idea how long we have been playing this game. I hate specialists, how about more drugs to manage the drugs that you are taking...to prolong a death that is coming.

I hate the fact that she makes $200 too much for Medi-cal which would have at least gotten us IHSS help. But no, instead, her ENTIRE income goes for Medicare, prescriptions, and the copays she racks up seeing every fucking Dr's in the North Valley. I hate the Medicare doughnut hole which she is CONSTANTLY in...it never stops...sure we can drop $300 on a bottle of insulin.

I hate dialysis 3x a week, I hate that we struggle to find rides for her to it. Yeah, forget family, drugs took that pipe dream...and the rest are too selfish or broken themselves. I hate that we live in poverty so we can care for her...that my children are missing out on opportunities so she can suck in more sympathy in her struggle to "get better" from two terminal diseases. (yeah, I don't think she gives two shits that professionals say she is dying...we can fight that! Maybe some more prayer)

Today is Caleb's birthday, and instead of making my 10-year-old his birthday cake...I'm on the phone with more Dr.s...making more appointments to appease more visiting caregivers (who btw drop her next week). I don't want to do this anymore. Instead, he's catering to her needs because she can't walk today. And she's depressed and crying about her lot in life...forget that it's his birthday...let's make it all about her as usual. Let's cry and have a break down because the only place she gets to go is dialysis.

I swear that if I ever get this sick, I will take the now legal suicide drugs and save my family from wasting decades of their lives while I rot and become an emotional manipulate, depressed, miserable human being. Loving your family means putting them first and knowing when it's time to clock out on your own terms.

And she is just getting worse, what comes next is bedridden 100%. So then I guess I quit working 100% and become her personal nurse since Medicare will only let her stay in a nursing home for 21 days and she makes too much money for Medi-cal.

Monday, May 22, 2017

Welcome Karter

So this boy is all grown up...
Ryan, 2006

And now the father of this boy.
Karter, 2017
Born on March 17th! Yes, a St. Patty's Baby...

And is engaged to this beautiful girl, Brittney.
Ryan and Brittney, SF 2017

And I have the pleasure of watching this little man, while his parents work. He's quite the camera hog...

Karter,  May 2017

Karter,  May 2017

Karter,  May 2017

Karter,  May 2017

Karter,  May 2017

Karter,  May 2017
Photo Credit: Brittney Braiser

Sometimes you just have to laugh

Adulting is hard, really hard some days. Today started off great, I managed to sort through the infamous "Red Binder", shredding things that needed to go and re-filing the things we use most often. Then got all three boys started on their projects for the "Home School Showcase" that we are hosting tomorrow. (yeah, talk about procrastination)

Caleb is building a bridge out of popsicle sticks to demonstrate physics and engineering...yet he could not get the glue open. So he brings it to me...points it towards me so I can look inside the rim and then squeezes it while saying "I can't get that hard seal thing out"...which at that moment proceeds to pop out and shoot into my hair...dripping glue down my hair, face, and dress. Caleb stood in stunned silence, then he began to laugh, a rolling deep belly laugh that took him to the floor. Being the good mother I am, I snapped some pics with my camera phone and sent them off to the husband to have a bit of laughter as well.

Who promptly responded with this photo...

I needed this bit of laughter after discovering my camera was broken...yes...the flash and bulb are broken. I've lovingly wrapped her up and she will be on her way to the Canon repair shop tomorrow. I'll miss her greatly.

Sunday, May 21, 2017

2012 Bucket List Update

  1. Bucket List revisited
  2. Updating the Bucket List (from 2012)
  3. My Bucket List
  4. Climb a volcano
  5. Win the Wright Family Chili Cook Off 
  6. Visit New Zealand
  7. Live in a loft apartment in San Francisco (probably a post-kid adventure)
  8. Visit the Grand Canyon
  9. Go on a hot air balloon ride in Napa
  10. Visit Alaska and see the Northern Lights
  11. Bike around the Buttes
  12. Travel route 66 (achieved that during the cross country move)
  13. Attend an Oktoberfest (anywhere lol)
  14. Try out Zumba (Thank you, Nicole Rubio, for the pushing lol)
  15. Dye my hair purple
  16. Play a paintball game
  17. Drive a Convertible
  18. Go on a $5000 shopping spree in the city
  19. Ride an elephant
  20. Visit a theme hotel (thank you Fantasy Inn...we got in before they closed lol)
  21. Try my hand at Cosplay
  22. Attend a Rein Faire
  23. See Phantom of the Opera at the theater
  24. Visit Japan
  25. Visit all 50 States (Cross off California, Utah, Oregon, Oklahoma and Washington, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona.off the list)
  26. Plant 50 trees
  27. Go White Water Rafting
  28. Visit Pike Place Market
  29. Ride in a Limo
  30. Drink a beer at a Guinness Brewery
  31. Learn to do archery
  32. Visit the White House in Washington DC
  33. Complete the couch to 5 K program
  34. Run in a fun run.
  35. Teach English in a foreign country
  36. Finish a baby book for each of the boys
  37. Have a piece of clothing tailor made just for me.
  38. Fly a Kite
  39. Participate in a flash mob
  40. Volunteer at a homeless shelter
  41. Take the kids to Crater Lake in Oregon to go camping
  42. Learn how to fly fish
  43. Walk Across the Golden Gate Bridge
  44. Find a wine that tastes good (Thank you to Stella Rosa Black!)
  45. Lose 40 pounds and keep it off for 6 months at least
  46. Go a week without watching TV or any computer time...no screen time at all.
  47. Start and finish a 365 photo project
  48. Drive a go cart
  49. Do a family tree
  50. Eat a fresh caught lobster
  51. Enjoy a weekend trip to a spa resort
  52. Buy a hot tub
  53. Make blankets for homeless children
  54. Donate my hair to locks of love
  55. Make Christmas Cards for soldiers
  56. Visit Vegas Baby!
  57. Have an exotic pet
  58. Win the lottery
  59. Host a full moon party
  60. Tour the Sistine Chapel
  61. Attend my 25-year high school reunion and actually enjoy myself.
  62. Visit 25 national parks
  63. Take part in a beach bonfire
  64. Buy a glass of lemonade from a child's stand for $100
  65. Buy a fountain for the yard
  66. Build a dozen garden boxes
  67. Grow organic tomatoes
  68. Start Vermicomposting
  69. Buy a compost tumbler and use it
  70. Take the kids to the Worm Factory
  71. Catch fireflies in a jar.
  72. Buy a pair of designer high heels
  73. Ride a bullet train
  74. Learn to Belly Dance
  75. Host a Family Reunion
  76. Buy a House
  77. Swim in the ocean on the East Coast
  78. Visit Disney World
  79. Go Scuba Diving
  80. Go Skinny Dipping
  81. Learn how to apply make up from a professional
  82. Go shopping with a group of friends on Black Friday
  83. Go Zip-Lining
  84. Take a Self-Defense Class
  85. Learn to Meditate
  86. Get my Fortune Read
  87. Go on a Helicopter Ride
  88. Learn CPR (accomplished...got the cards in November 2012)
  89. Attend the Kentucky Derby
  90. Go Blonde (just once)
  91. Go on a Cruise
  92. Backpack in Europe
  93. Climb to the top of a lighthouse
  94. Shoot a machine gun
  95. Attend Burning Man
  96. Fly First Class
  97. Go to a Music Festival
  98. Visit a Natural Hot Spring
  99. See Hearst Castle
  100. Get a pet cat  (The "Cat that We Don't Own" joined our family in late March of 2013)
  101. Make 1000 origami cranes
  102. Go to a Raiders Game
  103. Ride a tandem bike

Summer Bucket List- 2017

Summer Bucket List- 2017

1. Take a camping trip

2. Have a backyard water balloon fight.

3. Visit the Sutter Co. Museum

4. Attend a Gold Sox's Game

5. Watch fireworks.

6. Get Ice Cream From Brocks

7. Visit a "U-Pick" farm

8. Visit the "Worm Farm" in Durham

9. Go Swimming

10. Go to a fair

11. Go to a zoo

12. Have a water gun battle

13. Picnic at the park with friends

14. Go on a Treasure Hunt

15. Make a sidewalk chalk mural on the front sidewalk with the neighbors.

16. Do a family craft.

17. Make Smores

18. Sleep outside

19. Go to the beach

20. See a Summer Movie Club movie.

21. Go Bowling

22. Slip and slide on the lawn

23. Have a gourmet Lemonade stand (Nikolas wants to sell "fancy" lemonade just once)

24. Build a blanket fort in the back yard.

25. Blow Bubbles

26.  Host a big BBQ

27. Attend a concert in the park

28. Go to a Drive-In Movie

29. Grill a Pizza on the BBQ

30. Visit the local water parks...and review them.

Monday, October 17, 2016

Thursday, September 29, 2016

Loggerhead Sea Turtles

Prompt: Nadia, a character in "The View from Saturday"  wrote a report about sea turtles, and today you will plan your own report. Think about what species of sea turtle you would like to learn about and start your research. Review the steps of the writing process: 

The Writing Process
  • Pre-writing - Organize your ideas based on the type of writing.
  • First Draft - Write what comes to mind and don't worry about making it perfect.
  • Revising - Read your draft and add, cut, or change ideas; share your writing with someone to get feedback.
  • Editing (proofreading) - Carefully read through each line and correct grammar and misspelled words.
  • Final Draft/Publishing - Write or type a final version.

The Loggerhead Sea Turtle
By Caleb Gray

     The Loggerhead sea turtle is extremely interesting because we know so little about it. There are large chunks of their lives that we can’t study because we can’t track them that well.  There are seven species of sea turtle in the world. They are the Loggerhead, Green, Leatherback, Flatback, Olive Ridly, Hawksbill, and Kemps Ridly sea turtles. All of the species have amazing adaptions, which help them survive in their habitat.

     Loggerhead sea turtles have a very specific life cycle. They first break out from their egg, in a sandy mound on a beach in Florida.  Then they scurry across the beach to the ocean, unless eaten by crabs or hungry Sea Gulls.  They have an internal compass that guides them to the Gulf Steam into the Sargossa Sea or the Gulf of Mexico. There they spend twenty years, eating and developing.  When they old enough, they go back to the beach they were born on to lay eggs. After they lay their eggs, they leave their eggs and return to the ocean. 

     Loggerheads sea turtles habitat are different throughout their lifetime.  First, they start out on the beach, which is sandy and warm.  Then they go to the Gulf Stream in the ocean, which is warm, and fast moving current.  The habitat Sargossa Sea is still and mostly calm, covered with sargassum seaweed that provides shelter and food for many animals. 

     Loggerhead sea turtles have special adaptations help them to live in their habitat.  The beak sharp when it’s mature and is made to eat jellyfish and crack open the hardest of shells. The flippers are made to crawl on land and swim in the water.  The shell is  used to defend themselves against predators like a shield. These three important adaptations are what it needs to survive.
The Loggerheads are very interesting turtles to me.  The Loggerhead has a way of following magnetic waves, like an internal compass.  It starts out with an extremely soft shell and a very soft beak, so it’s easy to eat. Loggerheads bury their eggs in a mound, and they're young raise themselves. These are all reasons that we should try to protect the Loggerhead sea turtles. We can help them by trying to slow pollution, stopping boats from leaving oil all over the Sargossa Sea and leaving their nets out for the turtles to die in. 

Loggerhead Turtle

by Nikolas Gray

There are seven species of turtle the Olive Turtle, the Loggerhead Turtle, the Green turtle, the Leatherback turtle and a few others types of sea turtles. There were more sea turtles in the past but over time more natural disasters and human-made disasters keep happening and killing the turtles. Like loose fishing nets or loose fishing hooks, to over hunting the sea turtle fins or just plain dumping oil and trash in the ocean.  But there is hope for the sea turtles; scientists believe that if we start throwing away our trash in the garbage and recycling, we can slow pollution.

Every Loggerhead turtle starts off as an egg, buried in a mound of sand on the beaches of Florida. After forty to fifty days, they hatch and crawl to the ocean.  Their first 2 or 3 hours of life are rough (especially after they hatched) but the older they get, the less and fewer predators will eat them. A Loggerhead sea turtle can live up to 200 years.  During their life span, 80% of it is traveling back and forth from the Caribean Island to the beach, they were born on. 

A Loggerhead turtle's habitat is the Caribbean Islands or the beaches of Florida and sometimes you can find them in big coral reefs in the ocean. All turtles land or sea have cool adaptations that help them survive in their habitat. A Loggerhead turtles adaptations are its long neck, which helps it reach into places that it's body can't to help it catch prey.  Its strong beak, which helps it chomp the shells of Queen Conch and Jellyfish.  Its scales, help it push out the salt in the water from it's skin to keep their skin from drying out.  And their flippers they use to swim, and guiding their way through the water. 

  The Loggerhead turtle can also hold their breath for over 10 minutes when they are older,  but as a hatching, they can hold their breath for 3-4 minutes.  A Loggerhead turtle's diet is made up of sea plants  Jellyfish and Queen conch sea snails so they are considered omnivores. Omnivores are animals that eat both plants and meat. 

By learning more about The Loggerhead turtle, we can find ways to help  them and make sure they live on. It is important that their species live on so the food chain does not get disrupted.  Without the sea turtles, the animals they eat will become over-populated. They could ruin the food chain in the ocean. Having a healthy ocean is important because, without it we can't survive. 

Monday, August 29, 2016

Thursday, August 25, 2016